Reviews & Recommendations
All Men Are Men - Childhood Trauma & the Non-Alpha Male
All men are men. Some men are shamed by both men and women for “not being a man,” either for not comporting themselves as a man who exhibits typical/desirable masculine traits, or who “puts the pussy on the pedestal,” or who carries beliefs and values which are at odds with others, or who either cannot or will not meet a woman’s expectations, etc. They are the so-called beta males (non-Alpha males).
Childhood is the most crucial time in the life of a human being. It is the bedrock of our creative, conscious, logical, and ethical experiences as adults. In this day and age, more and more people are becoming aware that it was the relationship with our parents/caregivers—the intensely focused troublesome aspects of it—which created the most significant levels of dysfunction in our adult lives. We are normalized to trauma. But because it is normalized, we don’t recognize it as such. With trauma comes a loss of feeling, a loss of resilience in engaging with life’s inevitable painfulness. Trauma can stunt growth and development because it can capture a person’s energy and agency and cause them to react from pain and fear. Children are not born embodying maladaptive, inhumane, or anti-social behaviors. They are not born “bad.” But things can go terribly wrong when the needed ingredients for their full flourishing are not in place. A man choosing to live consciously has to contend with how he has been conditioned to live unconsciously. His level of consciousness is negatively correlated with the unresolved exigencies of childhood.
Dr Carpenter's excellent book presents examples of the life experiences of non-Alpha males and offers a path forward which is compassionate and helpful in assisting them on their journey to integrating their past traumas and woundings, so as to reclaim themselves and live their lives more fully and freely.